Ok, I’m just going to come out and say it and propriety be damned, lately my kids irritate the hell out of me.
At bedtime, 9 times out of 10 I want to kill them and be done with it. The crying, the mommy come back, one more story, one more song, stay one more minute, I want milk, I want water, change my diaper… oh my GOD, SHUT UP!!! It never ends, it goes on for hours, and the sad, sad thing is that it’s my own stupid fault. I gave them an inch, and then another inch and then another and two and a half hours later when they’ve taken a mile out of my patience, my willingness to take care of them, to please them, to make them happy I scream at them and then feel guilty all night. It’s a horrible cycle, perpetrated by me, the adult, but how do I get out of it? I have to be firm, I know. I just seem to always take the easy way out, I’m compliant, I coddle them, I do what they want, until I snap and then I don’t and they’re probably wondering who the hell the crazy person is who looks like their mother.
The easy way out always ends up being the hard way out, doesn’t it? Sure it’s easier handing out cookies rather than fruit or yoghurt for snack but then I get hyped up kids for an hour, it’s easier letting them watch tv while we eat but then I find I’m feeding two kids who are perfectly capable of feeding themselves because they’re both completely zonked out watching Diego or Dora or our new fave Tractor Tom.
Will I ever learn? Or are my kids going to start referring to me as Lunatic Mom, kind of like a superhero, maybe? Or more likely a super villain.
Does anyone have any suggestions on how not to want to commit massive murder/suicide every night? Cause, really, apart from bedtime my kids are actually pretty good, and I’m not Insano-Mom.
Oh! Insano-Mom! I kind of like that, a cape-wearing, sword-wielding, bottle-bearing, diaper-changing, time-out-giving, often-screaming super villain type character. I’m off to draw my costume now.